“Each person’s sex drive is like an appetite: Some people spend their whole life in the kitchen and think about food all the time; some people can skip lunch,” says Ritvo, who is also chair of the department of psychiatry and behavioral medicine at Mount Sinai Medical Center, Florida.
I am a girl I guess who thinks about food (ahem) a lot of the time. The reason I bring it up is not to brag or boast but just to state the facts. I used to think that there were many other women like me but as I have grown older and dare I say wiser I see that I am not in the norm. I guess I in some ways enjoy that fact because it does make me unique but on the other hand I have trouble finding women who identify with me. For me most of my friends (mostly married like myself) view sex and intimacy as a “chore” or something needing to be done like doing the laundry. I on the other hand view it as a way to show my significant other affection and love and connect in a way that is uniquely ours. In continuing the comparison of food appetite and sexual appetite I found this Sex and the City quote that kind of sums it up:
“Samantha: So, how were they?
Carrie: The pancakes? Delicious, exactly what I wanted. I couldn’t get enough.
Samantha: No, I was referring to the moves.
Carrie: Delicious, exactly what I wanted. I couldn’t get enough.”
I know that there are many things that go into the sex drive: biology, psychology, and relationships but that is another post. The therapist in me knows all about those things but in a practical sense I want to find some of my sisters in womanhood who share my love of sex. I want to find the friend who wants to talk openly about wanting to be with her partner in that way. I don’t mind most of the time really and kind of like the status with the men or being viewed as the “cool wife” .
I am just amazed that there are not more women who think more like me and do think about sex like a man which is more often than not…I guess I will continue to stay hopeful that there will be women who are like me. In the meantime however I will continue to read my erotica and indulge in my fantasies. I will let you in on the fact that my house might not be perfectly clean but my husband does wear a smile in terms of his sex life! Post some comments because I know you have viewpoints. Looking forward to hearing from you…